new growth
Saturday, July 02, 2005
the way i see it #23
"Chances are you are scared of fictions. Chances are you are only fleetingly happy. Chances are you know much less than you think you do. Chances are you feel a little guilty. Chances are you want people to lie to you. Perhaps the answer lies on the side of a coffee cup. You are lost."
-David Cross
These words bobbed in and out of my vison every time I took a sip of my overpriced coffee today. I don't feel lost or fleetingly happy and I definitely don't want people to lie to me. I was just thinking about how sad it is that now coffeehouse conversation needs to be prompted by some random quote.
How ironic is it that I was reading Adbusters in a Chapters, drinking a venti nonfat vanilla latte? I assure you I would support local business if there was any up here.
Reading Adbusters wasn't really a good idea. I used to criticize them for being all about the shock-factor but they now seem to be making progress- they're being more constructive.
But for what?
Is wearing socially responsible shoes going to really change things?
I don't know why I bother reading that trash. I'm not looking for hope.
I know Culture Jamming is not the answer.
But I was just feeling really odd today.
Disconnected, I guess.
Ten minutes before I was supposed to be at work- with no way of getting there - and I was just sitting at my computer, reading my email, not especially worried. At all.
After work I realized, again, I hadn't arranged a way to get home. So I started to walk with my bag full of leftover Yuha coolers.
Two hours later, I am home.
I thought about why I feel disconnected- why I am not connected. Simply put, I haven't connected with anyone today. Sure, there was plenty of conversation at work ("It's a new vodka cooler with 55% real fruit juice and it's not carbonated. We have mango-citrus, and orange-passionfruit-guava. Would you like to try both?") but there was nothing real.
I realized that I need that real conversation.
And I am so thankful for all the wonderful people in my life who help me stay connected.
-David Cross
These words bobbed in and out of my vison every time I took a sip of my overpriced coffee today. I don't feel lost or fleetingly happy and I definitely don't want people to lie to me. I was just thinking about how sad it is that now coffeehouse conversation needs to be prompted by some random quote.
How ironic is it that I was reading Adbusters in a Chapters, drinking a venti nonfat vanilla latte? I assure you I would support local business if there was any up here.
Reading Adbusters wasn't really a good idea. I used to criticize them for being all about the shock-factor but they now seem to be making progress- they're being more constructive.
But for what?
Is wearing socially responsible shoes going to really change things?
I don't know why I bother reading that trash. I'm not looking for hope.
I know Culture Jamming is not the answer.
But I was just feeling really odd today.
Disconnected, I guess.
Ten minutes before I was supposed to be at work- with no way of getting there - and I was just sitting at my computer, reading my email, not especially worried. At all.
After work I realized, again, I hadn't arranged a way to get home. So I started to walk with my bag full of leftover Yuha coolers.
Two hours later, I am home.
I thought about why I feel disconnected- why I am not connected. Simply put, I haven't connected with anyone today. Sure, there was plenty of conversation at work ("It's a new vodka cooler with 55% real fruit juice and it's not carbonated. We have mango-citrus, and orange-passionfruit-guava. Would you like to try both?") but there was nothing real.
I realized that I need that real conversation.
And I am so thankful for all the wonderful people in my life who help me stay connected.
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Thursday, June 16, 2005
obedience vs. submission
Would you think I was questioning your intelligence if I pointed out the relationship between the title of this blog and my profile picture (taken in Mazatlan, at the Bruja, by moi)?
Really. How perfect is that?
Enough about how great my blog is...
It's Feelings Time!
I'm feeling a little sad right now. Only shallowly, however. I won't be going to San Fran this summer, nor will I be able to take that course in Vancouver in August. It's the too-bad-it-didn't-work-out-but-it-is-probably-for-the-best kind of sadness, not to be confused with I'm-sick-of-this-rain sadness.
On the contrary, I love this rain.
Heavy rainfall warning?
Bring it on.
Really. How perfect is that?
Enough about how great my blog is...
It's Feelings Time!
I'm feeling a little sad right now. Only shallowly, however. I won't be going to San Fran this summer, nor will I be able to take that course in Vancouver in August. It's the too-bad-it-didn't-work-out-but-it-is-probably-for-the-best kind of sadness, not to be confused with I'm-sick-of-this-rain sadness.
On the contrary, I love this rain.
Heavy rainfall warning?
Bring it on.
Sunday, June 05, 2005
I'm having trouble getting to (and staying a-) sleep lately. Four or five times each night I wake up and think crazy thoughts:
"Did that woman at the store yesterday really ask where the dried raisins were?"
"Is it weird that I am almost nineteen and I can't remember how the 'I' Before 'E' rule goes?"
- or -
"Why do I keep making new promises when I can barely live up to the ones I have already made?"
That's the Big One - the question that makes me feel ill.
Then I sink back to sleep until a song that slowly digs its way into my consciousness wakes me.
The song I love waking up to these days is Iron & Wine's cover of "Such Great Heights" by the Postal Service.
"Did that woman at the store yesterday really ask where the dried raisins were?"
"Is it weird that I am almost nineteen and I can't remember how the 'I' Before 'E' rule goes?"
- or -
"Why do I keep making new promises when I can barely live up to the ones I have already made?"
That's the Big One - the question that makes me feel ill.
Then I sink back to sleep until a song that slowly digs its way into my consciousness wakes me.
The song I love waking up to these days is Iron & Wine's cover of "Such Great Heights" by the Postal Service.
Saturday, May 14, 2005
Thursday, May 05, 2005
Fancy Like Tokyo
So, here is a really late post of some pictures from my little trip to BC with Serena and Kristian. That was, what, a month ago? Ah well.
Scroll.
Scroll.
We were wandering by a waterfall and Serena asked (this is going to sound really sadistic, but you have to know Serena): "Would you rather fall off an unfamiliar waterfall in the dark to your death or be drowned by a loved one?" I just liked that she specified that it was an unfamiliar waterfall, like if it was a waterfall that you knew, it would be okay.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
